Director: Michael Bay
Writer/s: Art Marcum, Matt Holloway, Ken Nolan (screenplay), Akiva Goldsman, Art Marcum, Matt Holloway, Ken Nolan (story by)
Starring: Mark Wahlberg, Anthony Hopkins, Josh Duhamel, Laura Haddock, and more.
‘Transformers: The Last Knight’… Or, in my most humble opinion, it should be titled ‘Transformers: The Last Movie’ because this series needs to end. The debate could go on and on about what series should end; Cars, Fast, Transformers, XXX, whatever, but this series needs to end. The installment before this one was ‘Transformers: Age of Extinction’ and in my eyes, that was hot garbage. So now here we are with yet another Michael Bay Transformers and after AoE, how bad could this really be? Well, it is time to figure that out exactly through the eyes of Mr. Oberrated.
Humans and Transformers are at war, Optimus Prime is gone. The Key to saving our future lies buried in the secrets of the past, in the hidden history of Transformers on Earth.
What….the….F*&$??… What did I just watch? What happened? Okay, okay. Let us rewind, shall we?… ‘Transformers: Age of Extinction’ is hot garbage. Well, The Last Knight just made AoE look like a gourmet meal served in the White House. I do not know where to even begin but let me go ahead and give it a shot.
The film is all over the place, period. We fire out of the gates watching the Transformers mash-up with the knights of the round table. I am not kidding. The film is called ‘The Last Knight’ so why not give the tale a remix with Transformers, eh? The mash-up focuses on how Merlin was relied on to bring magical reinforcements to aid the knights in battle. So he talks to his buddy Transformer that he happened to know of, the Transformer gives him a magical staff and hints that it will bring great chaos to Earth if not protected… FORESHADOWING, WHAT COULD POSSIBLY HAPPEN NEXT?! Oh, and spoiler alert, Merlin gets to control a three-headed dragon and he saves the knights in the battle. Yay.
Now to present day: Humans and Transformers are at war against each other. All Transformers are marked as enemies, both Autobots and Decepticons. We are introduced to this whole concept and our main characters by way of a handful of young kids deciding to explore a restricted area, sparked by one kid asking the others if, “ya’ll wanna see a dead robot?”.. *sigh*.. From here on, we follow around Cade Yaeger (Mark Wahlberg) as he runs from the TRF since he is such a dangerous and wanted criminal. Ya know? Human who saved the world with the Transformers? Must be top of the list of dangerous individuals.
I could go on forever about the plot of the story and the confusion that comes with said plot so I am going to just focus on other things now. ‘Transformers: The Last Knight’ struggles extremely with trying to portray an intense and serious action adventure film versus a film that does not take itself seriously in the least bit by way of throwing absolutely ill-placed comedy all throughout the film, non-stop. Any moment that I for one second felt it was serious or was trying to focus on the severity of the actions being taken in the film, someone dropped some moronic quip or Cogman decided to speak. Overall I can not help but be angry at the constant jumping from drama to comedy throughout the whole duration of the film. Not my cup of tea.
The film is flooded with far too many moments that are straight up eye-roll worthy and if I were to point them all out, this would be my longest review ever so I am choosing to simply say that there were hardly any moments that I enjoyed versus how many moments I despised or was not a fan of. Bare minimum entertainment value, bare minimum point to why this film was even made.
‘Transformers: The Last Knight’ is a prime example of people mindlessly buying tickets to see this trainwreck and being “entertained” by the robot action and explosions. Age of Extinction was considered a “box office success” due to its overall international sales but by no means was it a good film. Maybe this time around people will look past the explosions and “cool scenes” and see what this film truly is because even the cool looking scenes did absolutely nothing for me. This film is a mess of absolute crap. The studio, the film, whoever, they continue to throw whatever they want at their audience regardless of how pointless or out of nowhere it is. Right when I thought that it could not get any worse than Age of Extinction, The Last Knight arrives. With a two hour and twenty-nine minute long run time that felt like four hours, as of June 25th, 2017, this is the worst film of 2017.